Unwanted Help - Jessie T. Wolf — LiveJournal
|Date:||September 10th, 2004 07:38 pm (UTC)|| |
I've known you a relatively short time, but I can see that you try to be a good person. Making the effort to help others is what counts.
I've often tried to help others. Sometimes they listen, and thinsg get better. Sometimes, they ignore what I have to say, and nothing changes. Sometimes, its just the fact that someone listened to them that helps.
The trick is to discern whether or not the person you are trying to help really wants things to improve. Sometimes people will simply try to get sympathy, and pity. They don't really want to change. They are familiar with their miseries. Changing things would mean making things different, and unfamiliar. That frightens many people more than the thought of whatever they might be suffering from at the moment.
Simply try to speak and act from the heart, with the sincere intention of trying to do good. Sometimes that means holding a person's hand and gently rmeinding them they are loved. Other times it may mean you have to give them a smack to in the face. I've always thought a real friend is the person who loves you enough to smack you down when you really need it.
Remember, helping someone improve their lives involves at leats two people. You and the person you are trying to help. Both of you need to work together. Offer help if you feel it is needed, or wanted. if the other person refuses or ignores your aid, then at least you have done your part. We can only offer a helping hand. Whomever we offer it to must accept it on their own.