Every time I think things are settled, I always end up with this looming feeling of unfinished business hanging over my head like some dark cloud. >.< Heard some rumors that a "friend" was talking crap about me, so I confronted said friend about this, because it was bothering me. I hate being on bad terms with people. And I always go out of my way to try to make things okay again.
But why do I do this? O.o Why can't I just forget about it, and move on? Why do I care if someone is spewing crap about me or not? Anyone who knows me well enough will know better anyway. And any person who would automatically believe something negative that someone else tells them before they even get to know me themselves, don't deserve my attention anyway.
Needless to say, the conversation with this friend of mine didn't really do much anyway. Every time I talk to this person, I forget half the things I wanted to say, or points I wanted to make. Half the time I never even know if I can believe what this person tells me anyway, as they have a history of lying through their teeth. I also worry for the sake of others who may get treated the same way by said person, and I hate to just sit by and watch it happen. >.<
Why do I still want to amend a friendship with someone who is like this? Because I remember all of the good times we did have... that's why. And I just can't believe how that was lost... how it turned so sour, so quickly. I feel for pat_the_fox, as he's recently gone through something similar. :/ *sends hugs out to Pat*
I don't hate this person. I don't think I ever could. But... I'm just really, really disappointed that things couldn't have turned out better, that's all. I just have to keep on telling myself that I did what I could, and now it's not worth dwelling over. I'm moving on. Hopefully this feeling of disappointment will leave me soon.
Must get work done...