Chaos! Yes, this was potoroo’s place tonight. About a million furs showed up to the Feral Party, a LOT more people than anyone was really expecting, and a good bit I didn’t know. So I spent the first bit of the meeting being rather antisocial because the crowd was bigger than what I’m used to, and I was also having a really hard time pushing recent stresses to the back of my mind.
I felt really awful tonight… I’ve had a lot on my mind, that I’ve had to keep bottled up for the past while. WAY long while, and it’s finally starting to crack down on me to the point where I really can’t handle it anymore. Tonight for the first time ever, I was at a furry gathering… and I was miserable, and this… shit… has finally pained me enough that it’s beginning to affect my ability to socialize. And I broke down… in the middle of a PARTY, I broke down and had to run upstairs and just ball my eyes out.
I love you iron_raptor, I really do… you’ve been there for me through thick and thin, throughout this entire mess, and I couldn’t be more grateful to have such a wonderful friend as you. I felt like such an idiot for breaking down and crying at the party tonight… but I just couldn’t hold it back any longer. Thank you for being there for me, and helping to make me feel less of a fool. And thanks to my other friends, ashbearfox for listening to me gripe, and to torrle for giving me warm cuddles.
After some alcohol and pizza and LOTS of hugs, cuddles, scritches and backrubs, I’m feeling a LOT better now. I gave Potoroo my Feral ‘05 ad pic, and he was very impressed with it, so I’m glad. I wish I could afford to go to Camp Feral this year, but I don’t know if I’ll have enough money after AC. I got to chat with silfur tonight too, which was nice since I haven’t seen him in a good long while. And got more rubs from teh seksay wily (I can still feel where you bit me!! *grins* Rar) and finally got in some good chatting and snuggle (and more biting!) time with niccibear, who later on swept me off into Wily’s room. ;) Heh, I liked hanging with you guys tonight. You all really helped to pick this wolfy up. You guys rock! *sniffle*
This was originally going to be a more angsty/bitchy post, but I’m too tired to be pissed off right now. And sore, and bruised. I will sleep well tonight.